inspired by a fellow blogger/writers’ recent post



I like darkness; the more the better. I like it to be so dark and so silent that I actually start to look over my shoulder every few minutes. I like having fresh cheese, tomatoes, salsa, guacamole, bread and wine laid out on a table in front of me for lunch (I miss you San Francisco lunches). I really like a cup of coffee with a cigarette, yet, both speed me up too much… and then I don’t like it anymore.

I like when Charlie, my cat, grazes my arm with his wet nose. The silence after midnight. I like walking around after midnight, when most are asleep so the need to speak ceases. Weeks at  Dharma Ocean; especially when in silent mode for days on end; I also like leaving Dharma Ocean after weeks of brutal meditation (with a sign of weariness and relief).

I like the smell of seaworms; yes, I can still smell you. And yes, the books still smell like you.

I like the feeling of books being in a perfect straight line. And I too, like the sound of a door being closed slowly. Foods that have the texture of skin; the smell of my fingertips after rolling a cigarette. Eating snow, sleeping in the mountains, people that don’t suck and convincing people who do that they don’t have to suck. I like waking up still in a dream, so connected I can taste and feel what was happening. I like the way Charlie just wants to sleep and purr; no other motives.

I like staring at my kids when they don’t know I’m looking. I like staring at my kids and annoying them when they know I’m looking. Getting lost in the woods. Taking the train somewhere unplanned and unknown. Left Hand Milk Stout, Amsterdam Shag tobacco, the smell of an apartment the morning after a ton of sage has been burnt. I like biting my nails ( it’s so damn satisfying). Riding my bike downtown with no destination or direction for hours.  A giant glass of milk with a plate of french toast.


I like ending things.

Embodied life

October 18, 2013


Thinking about intimacy.

How a lack of intimacy with self cuts off the connection completely. We sometimes come to a place of feeling a need for someone else to enter our life; to bring us acceptance, acknowledgement, happiness and meaning. But it is intimacy with ourselves that we are craving/lacking.

It’s easy to see how we come upon this “grey” state. Life gets tough, we sense that we are feeling too much, so we begin to distance ourselves from our experience/body. Using all sorts of creative distractions, keeping our brain occupied and on the move, we can live a life cut off from the painful aspects of life. What a lot of us fail to notice is that we are cutting off experiencing the pleasurable aspects of life, fully, as well.


The following website leads to the introductory teachings presented by Dharma Ocean. For those seeking an embodied life; one that embraces all of life’s experiences, fully, I invite you to take a look.


Best wishes on your journeys




The Three Lords

March 22, 2012

Which to wear?

Hmmmm…. Who will I see today?

This outfit speaks of wealth. I’ll be comfortable and fit in.

Wait… later, I’ll be seeing so and so…
Maybe I should bring a change of clothes?
Yes, this one will do. 
It speaks of logic and wisdom. All will know I have the answers.

But what if I run into someone else along the way?
What will they think of me today?
I’ll prepare another change.
Ahhhh… perfect! This one shows my watchfulness; constantly alert.

Ahhh screw it…
I’ll go naked
for a change.

Inspired by “Cutting Through Spiritual Materialism” by Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche

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